bruce potterAbout celebrating her birthday pt 3
June 23rd 2009 15:50
WHAT TO BUY?
So I said don’t buy her anything she wants or needs; so what do you get her?
5) Books – Nice choice; most women read more than their man does, so find out what she reads and perhaps buy the next in the series if she’s reading The Twilights or Harry Potters. Try to make it special by getting her the hardcopy or even collectors edition copy of her favourite book. You must then inscribe the book. Just something simple; a good idea is if you know the book then use an appropriate quote from it in the inscription.
6) Jewellery - fine choice; but be particular. Try to get her something that fits in with the rest of her collection; some girls choose to wear only gold or only silver; some wear seasonal jewellery; some wear antique. You should have an idea of what she likes so use that as a guide in your choice and you’ll be surprised at how relatively affordable an elegant pair of earrings can be.
My tip – Spend $60 on a watch or a bracelet. Women aren’t monogamous with their watches, they can have many. A simple, yet quite stylish watch won’t cost that much.
Then get it engraved; same with the bracelet. Make it an enduring message – “Loving You” or “Missing You” is stronger than “I Love You”. Also don’t put the date with “I Love You” with it as it may mark the last time you said it.
7) Clothes/shoes – don’t even think about it. The chances of you choosing the right style/colour/size/price are extremely remote; besides most girls quite like the act of buying their clothes which you shouldn’t deny them. And don’t do the lazy act of
“Let’s go to the mall and you choose something and I’ll pay for it.” While this might be financially generous, I find it quite a cheap gesture, and it takes no effort on your part.
And besides you’re not Tony Soprano, so stop acting like it.
8) Music – Buying a CD is fine, but it’s difficult to personalize it. My tip – bring back the MIX TAPE. Yes from those stupidly romantic 80’s, the mixtape, or burnt CD as it is now is still a great way of showing her you care. Grab a bunch of her CD’s and dump
her favourite tracks onto a disc. I’ve used movie quotes that I‘ve ripped, sorry borrowed, from the interweb as links between songs. Another mate used to do his own DJing and stick his voice down to intro the songs. Just make an effort.
9) Lingerie – Delicate area; the simple definition is – she likes it – you like her in it, everybody’s happy. But there are mines to avoid here. If you’ve bought it for her before, then you’ll know what she likes and what size she needs. If you’re buying it for the first time, don’t go too slutty; she’ll wear it once and it’ll stay in the back of the underwear draw. Similarly a crotchless item will get worn once, until it appears on somebody’s head after one cocktail too many at the hen’s night.
Choosing the right size can be difficult; choose too small and you might find yourself looking into eyes welling up; choose too loose and it'll look like Nana's had too much sherry again. It needs to be elegant and yet functional; something she’ll wear often.
You could step into the trouble I did by buying too well – a week after the said items were graciously received I was asked just how often have I bought lingerie?
Also, if you’re buying lingerie, don’t make it the only thing you buy her, or else she’ll feel like you’re only with her because of how good she looks in her underwear.
My tip – satin robe; very hard to screw up the size; classy, practical and she’ll look great in it and love wearing it.
10)Dinner – Dinner or dinner and show is a fine idea, but with theatre tickets it could cost you around $300. My tip – cook her dinner. If you’re a decent cook, then well done; if you think the kitchen is place for storing the microwave and the beer, then make an effort. Talk to your mother or sister or somebody, or even just look up some recipes.
Three courses of soup, roast and vegies, and a dessert is not that hard. You can even bribe her by saying that she has to wear her lovely new robe to dinner or she doesn’t get any chocolate mousse.
Even if you completely ruin the meal, (and if you’re living together she won’t let that happen) then she’ll still appreciate the effort.
11)Surprise party- Bad idea; Looks good on paper, but you need all the planets to align to pull it off. First hurdle is it’ll take a lot of effort for maybe not much gain. The modern woman is a chameleon – she’ll act a certain way around her workmates, then another way around her netball/gym friends, then different again around her family. Throwing that together is a challenge a woman only wants one day in her life.
Also organizing it will require you meddling in her life; talking to her friends behind her back and asking them to keep something from her is a little awkward at best; you also might find yourself having to deal with a surprise rejection.
12)Surprise Weekend Away – This is a great idea; book a weekend up the coast, or on the mountains, then refuse to tell her where but to pack a bag with a few essential items and then off you go.
13)Flowers - Fine idea; just make them part of the presentation, not the only thing. Also, buy them from a florist and not a service station or a supermarket. They won't cost much more and they'll be much better. You won't be able to notice how much, but she will, and once again, she'll appreciate the effort.
CONCLUSION
If you combine items – the card, the robe, the dinner; or the watch, the CD, the card and dinner you should have a very good shot at making your special one happy for a relatively small outlay.
It’s all about effort; indeed it’s less about money in contrast to the way it’s about effort. The more effort you put in, the less it should cost you, the more she’ll appreciate it. Try to keep the element of surprise handy - if have to ask her about what size she is, or what book she’s reading, then give up. Women always want to be surprised by the will of good men.
It may sound a little dramatic, but the elements are the same – you need to treat your partner’s birthday like it’s a presentation to the UN Security Council- come prepared, use utmost diplomacy, be heartfelt in your presentation and you should have peacetime on the majority of fronts for the foreseeable future. Until you forget where you put your pocket diary…
It’s the beauty of truth that I love.
So I said don’t buy her anything she wants or needs; so what do you get her?
5) Books – Nice choice; most women read more than their man does, so find out what she reads and perhaps buy the next in the series if she’s reading The Twilights or Harry Potters. Try to make it special by getting her the hardcopy or even collectors edition copy of her favourite book. You must then inscribe the book. Just something simple; a good idea is if you know the book then use an appropriate quote from it in the inscription.
6) Jewellery - fine choice; but be particular. Try to get her something that fits in with the rest of her collection; some girls choose to wear only gold or only silver; some wear seasonal jewellery; some wear antique. You should have an idea of what she likes so use that as a guide in your choice and you’ll be surprised at how relatively affordable an elegant pair of earrings can be.
Then get it engraved; same with the bracelet. Make it an enduring message – “Loving You” or “Missing You” is stronger than “I Love You”. Also don’t put the date with “I Love You” with it as it may mark the last time you said it.
7) Clothes/shoes – don’t even think about it. The chances of you choosing the right style/colour/size/price are extremely remote; besides most girls quite like the act of buying their clothes which you shouldn’t deny them. And don’t do the lazy act of
“Let’s go to the mall and you choose something and I’ll pay for it.” While this might be financially generous, I find it quite a cheap gesture, and it takes no effort on your part.
8) Music – Buying a CD is fine, but it’s difficult to personalize it. My tip – bring back the MIX TAPE. Yes from those stupidly romantic 80’s, the mixtape, or burnt CD as it is now is still a great way of showing her you care. Grab a bunch of her CD’s and dump
her favourite tracks onto a disc. I’ve used movie quotes that I‘ve ripped, sorry borrowed, from the interweb as links between songs. Another mate used to do his own DJing and stick his voice down to intro the songs. Just make an effort.
9) Lingerie – Delicate area; the simple definition is – she likes it – you like her in it, everybody’s happy. But there are mines to avoid here. If you’ve bought it for her before, then you’ll know what she likes and what size she needs. If you’re buying it for the first time, don’t go too slutty; she’ll wear it once and it’ll stay in the back of the underwear draw. Similarly a crotchless item will get worn once, until it appears on somebody’s head after one cocktail too many at the hen’s night.
Choosing the right size can be difficult; choose too small and you might find yourself looking into eyes welling up; choose too loose and it'll look like Nana's had too much sherry again. It needs to be elegant and yet functional; something she’ll wear often.
You could step into the trouble I did by buying too well – a week after the said items were graciously received I was asked just how often have I bought lingerie?
Also, if you’re buying lingerie, don’t make it the only thing you buy her, or else she’ll feel like you’re only with her because of how good she looks in her underwear.
My tip – satin robe; very hard to screw up the size; classy, practical and she’ll look great in it and love wearing it.
10)Dinner – Dinner or dinner and show is a fine idea, but with theatre tickets it could cost you around $300. My tip – cook her dinner. If you’re a decent cook, then well done; if you think the kitchen is place for storing the microwave and the beer, then make an effort. Talk to your mother or sister or somebody, or even just look up some recipes.
Three courses of soup, roast and vegies, and a dessert is not that hard. You can even bribe her by saying that she has to wear her lovely new robe to dinner or she doesn’t get any chocolate mousse.
Even if you completely ruin the meal, (and if you’re living together she won’t let that happen) then she’ll still appreciate the effort.
11)Surprise party- Bad idea; Looks good on paper, but you need all the planets to align to pull it off. First hurdle is it’ll take a lot of effort for maybe not much gain. The modern woman is a chameleon – she’ll act a certain way around her workmates, then another way around her netball/gym friends, then different again around her family. Throwing that together is a challenge a woman only wants one day in her life.
Also organizing it will require you meddling in her life; talking to her friends behind her back and asking them to keep something from her is a little awkward at best; you also might find yourself having to deal with a surprise rejection.
12)Surprise Weekend Away – This is a great idea; book a weekend up the coast, or on the mountains, then refuse to tell her where but to pack a bag with a few essential items and then off you go.
13)Flowers - Fine idea; just make them part of the presentation, not the only thing. Also, buy them from a florist and not a service station or a supermarket. They won't cost much more and they'll be much better. You won't be able to notice how much, but she will, and once again, she'll appreciate the effort.
CONCLUSION
If you combine items – the card, the robe, the dinner; or the watch, the CD, the card and dinner you should have a very good shot at making your special one happy for a relatively small outlay.
It’s all about effort; indeed it’s less about money in contrast to the way it’s about effort. The more effort you put in, the less it should cost you, the more she’ll appreciate it. Try to keep the element of surprise handy - if have to ask her about what size she is, or what book she’s reading, then give up. Women always want to be surprised by the will of good men.
It may sound a little dramatic, but the elements are the same – you need to treat your partner’s birthday like it’s a presentation to the UN Security Council- come prepared, use utmost diplomacy, be heartfelt in your presentation and you should have peacetime on the majority of fronts for the foreseeable future. Until you forget where you put your pocket diary…
It’s the beauty of truth that I love.
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