bruce potterHow to write a good online dating profile
August 8th 2008 00:42
Online dating is now considered an excellent way to meet that special person. Several of my friends have actually married someone they met online.
I have another friend though that complains she keeps meeting the wrong kinds of people. I took a look at her profile and I can see why.
About me
Oh god I don't know happy out going I suppose, umm like to party with my friends. I like to laugh.
Under what are you looking for she writes
Someone who is a blokes bloke, will get out and do stuff with his hands. Not a wimp, doesn't mind getting his hands dirty.
My friend likes a drink but, she is also very sweet and kind. You would never guess that from this profile though. May be I am exagerating when I say this makes her sound like someone with no confidence who gets drunk every weekend. It sounds like she would eat an office worker or techy guy alive, when believe it or not that's the sort of man she thinks she wants to meet.
The main reason online dating doesn't work for some people is they don't know how to write a good profile.
So how do you write a good profile then? Well first think about who you are, and what your interests are (and I do not mean, clichés like walks along the beach). Think about your goals and your aspirations, or your career. How would you describe your personality? List everything you can think of.
Next, think about what you want. For example, are you looking for a long-term relationship with a view to marriage, or, are you looking for a few drinks with a view to casual sex. Either way it does not matter as long as you are upfront about it. If you want a casual relationship do not approach people looking for something long term, it is not fair.
You need to choose a good user name that describes who you are and what you want. If you are looking for a long-term relationship, do not use – Party Animal, or Sexy chick for example.
Choose a good tag line. This one sentence sums you up, and sums up what you are looking for in a partner. Like advertising, it needs to appeal to the right market. It is the second most important part of your profile (after your photo). Try using something light and funny. Try a quote from your favourite author or movie. Avoid clichés and under no circumstances say – I am the one your mother warned you about.
When you are writing your profile try to describe yourself in 150 – 200 words. Be positive without showing off. Imagine you were on a first date; you need to write your profile in such a way that gives people something to latch onto. Think about what sort of things you discuss on a first date. Perhaps your career goals, or jobs you have had. Do not just say I like (whatever) genre of music actually name some bands. Instead of saying I am a funny guy, tell a joke. Instead of ‘I like movies,’ name some you enjoyed. Do not be negative in anyway, and never mention your exes, it just screams baggage.
Here are some clichés to try to avoid:
1. I like to laugh - (who doesn’t)
2. I am a genuine guy - (really? Then why do you need to say it)
3. I enjoy nights out and nights in (as opposed to what?)
4. I can’t believe I am doing this (why because everyone else is desperate?)
5. I am a zany wacky spontaneous guy/girl – (translated I am dull and can’t have a serious conversation)
Most of all be honest about yourself, someone I know said they enjoyed opera and then had to sit through four and a half hours of opera on her first date. Make sure your photo is honest to. Do not put up a photo that is 10 years old when you were 10kgs lighter- you will be found out! Also if you are looking for a serious relationship don't put your best Pamela Anderson lookalike picture up, and boys no genitalia or bare chests please.
I have another friend though that complains she keeps meeting the wrong kinds of people. I took a look at her profile and I can see why.
About me
Oh god I don't know happy out going I suppose, umm like to party with my friends. I like to laugh.
Under what are you looking for she writes
Someone who is a blokes bloke, will get out and do stuff with his hands. Not a wimp, doesn't mind getting his hands dirty.
My friend likes a drink but, she is also very sweet and kind. You would never guess that from this profile though. May be I am exagerating when I say this makes her sound like someone with no confidence who gets drunk every weekend. It sounds like she would eat an office worker or techy guy alive, when believe it or not that's the sort of man she thinks she wants to meet.
The main reason online dating doesn't work for some people is they don't know how to write a good profile.
So how do you write a good profile then? Well first think about who you are, and what your interests are (and I do not mean, clichés like walks along the beach). Think about your goals and your aspirations, or your career. How would you describe your personality? List everything you can think of.
Next, think about what you want. For example, are you looking for a long-term relationship with a view to marriage, or, are you looking for a few drinks with a view to casual sex. Either way it does not matter as long as you are upfront about it. If you want a casual relationship do not approach people looking for something long term, it is not fair.
You need to choose a good user name that describes who you are and what you want. If you are looking for a long-term relationship, do not use – Party Animal, or Sexy chick for example.
Choose a good tag line. This one sentence sums you up, and sums up what you are looking for in a partner. Like advertising, it needs to appeal to the right market. It is the second most important part of your profile (after your photo). Try using something light and funny. Try a quote from your favourite author or movie. Avoid clichés and under no circumstances say – I am the one your mother warned you about.
When you are writing your profile try to describe yourself in 150 – 200 words. Be positive without showing off. Imagine you were on a first date; you need to write your profile in such a way that gives people something to latch onto. Think about what sort of things you discuss on a first date. Perhaps your career goals, or jobs you have had. Do not just say I like (whatever) genre of music actually name some bands. Instead of saying I am a funny guy, tell a joke. Instead of ‘I like movies,’ name some you enjoyed. Do not be negative in anyway, and never mention your exes, it just screams baggage.
Here are some clichés to try to avoid:
1. I like to laugh - (who doesn’t)
2. I am a genuine guy - (really? Then why do you need to say it)
3. I enjoy nights out and nights in (as opposed to what?)
4. I can’t believe I am doing this (why because everyone else is desperate?)
5. I am a zany wacky spontaneous guy/girl – (translated I am dull and can’t have a serious conversation)
Most of all be honest about yourself, someone I know said they enjoyed opera and then had to sit through four and a half hours of opera on her first date. Make sure your photo is honest to. Do not put up a photo that is 10 years old when you were 10kgs lighter- you will be found out! Also if you are looking for a serious relationship don't put your best Pamela Anderson lookalike picture up, and boys no genitalia or bare chests please.
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