bruce potterMen are not Projects
June 8th 2009 13:05
Awake! Awake!
Note to all women hunting for the perfect guy - Men are not projects. Here's what I'm sick of hearing from girls - "When we first started going out he had so much potential, but now he's just like every other guy."
Don't judge your potential life-partner on whether he has it - potential. Judge him on his merits,on his character,on the depth of his heart. Don't judge him on what he could be.
Through the extensive chatting to friends, reading of advice columns, and watching of Sex in The City from an early age, women have a level of expectation of their life partner.
Note to all women - whatever your level of expectation is now, please lower it by about 300%.
Because if you want a joyful, loving and harmonious relationship, it's not going to be with somebody who looks like George Clooney, has a fabulous career and spends very little time with his mates. Somebody who can sit just as comfortably in the third row at Bell Shakepeare's latest effort, as he does in the fifth row at the SCG cheering on the Swans. Somebody who will guide you through a difficult family barbeque, and then happily watch Reese Witherspoon's latest cinematic triumph. Somebody who will know just the right thing to say and when to say it. And somebody who will make love to you passionately by the fireside of his Tuscany chalet. You know why? Because that man is not interested in having sex with you at all because he's gay.
This is not to say men who proudly feature some of those attributes is gay; quite the contrary - some men will tick some of those boxes, some will tick many, but none will tick all. And therein lies my point - if your guy meets some of those expectations, be happy with him and go off and have your joyful, harmonious life partnership. And please don't expect him to acquire all of those qualities, because he won't, and trying to meet those standards is going to suck the fun out of whatever good you guys had going.
He won't like trying to meet your standards, and you will like him less for failing.
I want to live in a world obsessed not with the beauty of youth, but the beauty of truth.
R.P. MacMurphy
Note to all women hunting for the perfect guy - Men are not projects. Here's what I'm sick of hearing from girls - "When we first started going out he had so much potential, but now he's just like every other guy."
Don't judge your potential life-partner on whether he has it - potential. Judge him on his merits,on his character,on the depth of his heart. Don't judge him on what he could be.
Through the extensive chatting to friends, reading of advice columns, and watching of Sex in The City from an early age, women have a level of expectation of their life partner.
Note to all women - whatever your level of expectation is now, please lower it by about 300%.
This is not to say men who proudly feature some of those attributes is gay; quite the contrary - some men will tick some of those boxes, some will tick many, but none will tick all. And therein lies my point - if your guy meets some of those expectations, be happy with him and go off and have your joyful, harmonious life partnership. And please don't expect him to acquire all of those qualities, because he won't, and trying to meet those standards is going to suck the fun out of whatever good you guys had going.
I want to live in a world obsessed not with the beauty of youth, but the beauty of truth.
R.P. MacMurphy
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